It's a Wonderful Life

Well it seems that I am going to be making monthly updates. I am ok with that amount because if I tried to commit more time, I would fail.

River is 4 months old today! It has been a very exciting weekend. Friday night, I went out with my old friends. This was my first night out since having the baby and basically since I have been pregnant. I was very nervous about leaving River but it worked out alright. I had a lot of fun but I can honestly say, I much prefer being home with my baby--even if it means going to bed at 8:30 every night. I love being a mom and I love having the peace of mind that comes with staying with him. It was very nice to get a little break but I can't say I "let loose" because I couldn't keep my mind off my baby the whole night!

Saturday was Sweetest Day. Max and I don't really celebrate Hallmark holidays but we did exchange a "Happy Sweetest Day" to each other and that was nice. It was time to get River a bath and when we were done, I went upstairs to get changed out of my PJ's and Max went to go get River dressed. I was in the middle of changing when Max called to me from downstairs. "Shelbi, come here and look!" I didn't want to miss the cute thing River was doing so I ran downstairs with a shirt on and my underwear. I saw River was wearing an outfit I didn't recognize (I have a photographic memory of his entire wardrobe haha). When I got a little closer...This is what I saw

I was in complete shock. I turned to look at Max and he was on one knee. He proposed to me (while I was still in my undies) and of course I said yes. The ring was in the "yes" pocket so I pulled it out and got to put on this amazing ring.

My grandma made the onsie and my son got to wear it. It was more than I could ever imagine a proposal would be.  It was very sentimental and I love that kind of stuff. I will get to keep that onsie forever. 

Later on that, Max and I got to go out on our first date night with out the baby. We had a good time but didn't stay out too late. We missed our boy and wanted to go home with him and snuggle up together as a family.

It was such a wonderful night and I cannot wait to start planning our wedding. We are thinking about having it next year or the following year. It would be easier and less stressful if we had it 2 years from now but we aren't sure if we want to wait that long. One thing is for certain, it will be in the Fall (I'm aiming for October).

Now I can really put my Pintrest Wedding Board to use ;)

River is 4 months today and he is such a happy baby! He has is fussy moments, but the happy times far outshine the bad. He is my sunshine. He is babbling and repeating me when I say 'ohhh' and 'ahhh' to him. He is a little parrot! River is also laughing and cooing up a storm. He still hates tummy time but it gets a little easier every day. On a side note (this is probably TMI) but today is also the day that River was conceived a year ago :)

He also loves being worn in the ring sling!

My life is complete! I have a wonderful man and a beautiful son. I am so thankful and lucky that I have the opportunity to be a stay at home mom while I attend school. I am blessed in more ways than I know. This weekend really made me open my eyes again to see all the beautiful things I had in my life. Friends, family and lots of love surrounds me. This was just what I needed! 

3 Months of Love

Ok so I haven't been totally dedicated to this blog but better late than never! This will be short because I need to get some sleep and its getting late. 

River turned 3 months a few days ago! He has definitely "woke up" and is showing off his personality. The good news: he sleeps great at bed time. Of course he wakes up a few times to eat but that it totally expected of a BF baby. 

He is 13lbs now and 3 month clothes still fit him but won't for long. His size 1 diapers are getting too snug for my liking so I moved up to sized 2 today! River is laughing and cooing now. I LOVE it. He is usually pretty happy until around 5pm and then he gets fussy until bed time. Nothing unbearable though. 

In bad news: my car is a piece of junk. I don't even want to go into details but its broken down 3x in the last month. I'm so over it. We have also been Internet and cable free for the last 2.5 weeks due to some bad planning on some people's part (those people shall remain nameless) but we should hopefully be getting Internet again Wednesday. No cable though..it's stupid expensive! Netflix is all I need :)

Still in the process of getting the official BreastFeeding Support Organization for Sinclair Moms. It's a long process but it will be worth it! 

Anyway, enjoy some pictures of my little stinker. 

More on Why I am Doing This

This is for the people making comments about the lactation rooms. I hope Sinclair reads it as well. If this is of no interest to you, then keep scrolling! I know not everyone is going to agree with me and that is just fine. However, I would like to clear a few things up :)  First, this is not just for me. This is for other breastfeeding moms who have had to struggle to find a place to go to in a reasonable amount of time to pump. I am so glad it was not a problem for some of you! You are lucky because I know other women besides myself that have had the same issues I am having.  Also this is not a breastfeeding in public issue. I am grateful and appreciative of the fact that Sinclair has opened up the faculty lactation room to students but I am requesting more and if you read on, you will find out why.

Next, someone mentioned I was requesting a pumping area in every room.  Of course it would be ridiculous to have a pumping area in every room! That would probably cause distraction as well. If they meant building, then yes, there should be a room in every building because every woman has a different pumping schedule to abide by. Their body governs that. Because of this, it might not be feasible to walk across campus to the only lactation room available and walk back to class. For someone who has never had to pump or breastfeed, I know it can be kind of hard to understand.  Also, finding an empty room or closet in each building should really not be that difficult for Sinclair. If it is, then by all means, they can contact me and let me know why and maybe we can brainstorm together a better solution!

I notice some comments mentioning that I should of just spoke up and asked the administration for help. Thank you for that suggestion but I already tried that and that is exactly why all of this is happening.
To those of you saying that I should “take care of my responsibilities” and then come back to school, I really appreciate your suggestion and your efforts in trying to find a different solution for me! But do you not think continuing my education is the responsible thing to do? Again, my point is that a breastfeeding mother does not have to take a break from school if she has the support from them. She also does not have to quit breastfeeding! No sacrifices have to be made just because someone chooses to have a child.
The cost issue seems to be a big concern for everyone. It should be! I don’t think it should come out of student’s pockets. However, I fail to see how this will cost any money, and if it does cost money, then again, I would love to sit down with Sinclair and brainstorm ideas on how we can raise money to help. There are grants out there and I’m sure fundraising could help as well. Everyone supports the “PINK” breast cancer research campaign so I am sure we can find people willing to support the breasts intended function as well.

In regards to tarnishing Sinclair’s name; that was and still is not my goal. Sinclair is a great school and I enjoy coming here. I appreciate that they have opened up the faculty lactation room for the students. That is a great step. I think Sinclair offers a lot of opportunities for people out there. They cater to a demographic of mostly adults; many of whom are mothers. They also offer many degrees in the medical field. They should be well aware of the benefits of breastfeeding and the importance it has on mothers and children. Those two facts combine leave me to wonder why this is even an issue. Sinclair has an opportunity to set an example for other colleges around the area and even around the country.

In brief, I want Sinclair to recognize the need for more lactation rooms and start to work toward that goal. I would also like to see Sinclair post information about these lactation rooms so women that need them, can easily find them.

For those of you that want to personally attack me, I understand that it might make you feel better but I have nothing to say to you. It shows a lot about your character and I don’t feel the need to fight back against your poor judgment.

I am not looking for a lawsuit. I am not looking for money. I am looking for change. If you are a woman who pumps and is OK with pumping in a bathroom or their car, then keep doing it. I am doing this for those of us that do care.

Side Note: This is not going to be over until there are some real efforts being made. Why do the bare minimum? There will soon be a Facebook page, a Blog and YouTube Channel that focuses on this cause specifically. Stay tuned!

Why I Always Talk About Breastfeeding

When I became a mother, I knew my life was going to change and that includes my interests. Typically, when someone works hard at something and is successful at it, that becomes their interest and their passion. For example: musicians are passionate about their music; cooks are proud of their dishes, and artists are excited about their paintings.
   Now what is the passion and interests of a stay at home mom you might ask? Well first and foremost it is her child (which is obvious due to the fact that 90% of what I post is either a picture of my kid or a status about my kid). My next major interest is breastfeeding! You may find yourself asking "Why is she so crazy about breastfeeding?" or "Who CARES?!?" If you have never breastfed a child, then I would expect these types of responses from you. A mother who has breastfed her baby knows how hard it is. It is not something that comes easy to a lot of moms. It takes so much dedication and work. Oh and pain! Sometimes it can be painful that no nipple cream can fix! Hell yeah I am going to be proud of it! These posts are for those who find themselves thinking "who cares?" or "That is gross!"  It is to get the message out there that breastfeeding is normal. It is also so that our future generations will not be stuck with the stigma that breasts are purely sexual. It is for the women who are afraid to breastfeed and the women who are struggling and want to give up. Breastfeeding mothers truly need all the support they can get!
    I am tired of hearing about mothers whom choose to breastfeed in public who are  asked to cover up or go to the bathroom. These things happen because our society is not used to seeing breasts being used for their intended purpose. The only way to combat this stigma is to breastfeed our children in public more often so that it is no longer shocking. And GUESS WHAT? If more women breastfeed in public, more women will follow. The more women who follow, the more likely it is that their children will choose to breastfeed their child (Oh and by the way, if you haven't heard, breast is best!). Our society needs to normalize breastfeeding.
    I know some women cannot breastfeed due to their own body issues or medical issues. I am not hating on them. It really has nothing to do with mom's who choose to formula feed their child. I just want to see more women be educated about their choices and not be too embarrassed to breastfeed.

With that being said, I am here to tell you that I'm not going to stop posting or talking about breastfeeding just because it is not a topic that concerns you. Quite frankly I could care less about your daily agenda that you post about or how awesome your drunken weekends are, but I know how to kindly keep scrolling or how to silently click the "hide from timeline" button. You too can practice this method if my posting bothers you. This topic is of deep interest to me and I will not be intimidated by those who do not share the same feelings.

Now I don't flap my gums and use my social media privileges for nothing! If you haven't heard, I am having issues with finding a place to pump at my school! River needs his breast milk and when he receives a bottle of it, I have to pump to keep my supply up and to provide more food for him when I am away. Unfortunately, I have had to jump through hoops to try and find an appropriate place to pump at (the locker room and bathroom that have been so kindly pointed out to me are not acceptable to make my child's food) and I have resorted to starting a petition to take to the Student Government in the Fall in hopes to raise more awareness for the need of lactating rooms. My ultimate goal is to see a breastfeeding room in every building at my college (Duke University has them-and provides the pumps!).

Here is a link to the petition. Please sign and share. I must cut this short because I have to go nurse my hungry child :)

http://www.change.org/petitions/sinclair-community-college-support-breastfeeding-mothers

2 Months old!

River turned 2 Months old yesterday!  He weighs 10lbs 10oz! I just switched him to size one diapers today.  He is smiling much more and follows me around the room.  We are still exclusively breastfeeding and he gets one bottle a day!

I started school this week and I'm on a crusade to get appropriate pumping amenities for pumping mom's! I find it a bit ridiculous that employers are required to provide amenities for employees but not the same rules apply for colleges and their students.  A bathroom is not an appropriate place to make food for our babies. 

Anyway,  mommy hood is a roller coaster but I'm enjoying it.  I love my little man so much!

Sleepless Nights, Bright Beginning's

I try to be in bed by 8:30pm. Even on the weekends.  If you are a new mom, you can totally understand why.  Otherwise,  you may think of me as the most boring person ever.  Sometimes I think about all the things I am missing out on as I slip off my nursing shirt and replace it with a nursing bra (don't forget the nursing  pads!) I think about the times where I would stay up past midnight,  socializing and drinking delicious wine. Or the time we spontaneously went on a trip to Europe (that never actually happened but I could have done it!).
But before I can regret anything about my life, I look at my son and remember that I still get to experience an adventure.  An adventure that is priceless and more meaningful than any historical landmark.  I may be missing  out on sleep and other seemingly important things in life but I get to replace all of those things with one monumental experience that has many little satisfactions wrapped into it.  It is often referred to as motherhood.  It may not always look  exciting and pretty,  but it is a gift that I am learning to love more everyday.  As I peel my eyelids open for the 2544 time in the middle of the night to tend to the little grunts and coos coming from the little ball of cuteness next to me,  I remind myself that this will past and I might just miss it one day.  My baby will grow and won't stop. And the only mistake I can make is taking these moments (even the hard,  "I'm going to cry from exhaustion  and sore nipples" moments) for granted.  I smile at the thought of putting up the Christmas  tree with my son,  picking out Halloween costumes with him, going to the water park and seeing the look on his face when his toes touch the ocean for the first time.  Although I don't think fondly of the times he will be sick,  or the 5 times I will have to clean up puke in a day,  or having to hand down his first punishment,  it is all a part of parenthood and the most exciting adventure of my life.  I would be a fool to regret any of it; even the sleepless nights. 

The Optimistic Control Freak

I am that mom that is riddled with anxiety. Every move I make is stratigically planned out in my head before it happens. When I take a shower, I thimk about what I will do first; towels out then get undressed? Or should I get undressed first and bring the towels with me? I like things to go smoothly and calling me a control freak might be an understatement.
  These character "flaws" have their advantage as well. I am typically well prepared and I hardly ever lose my cool; even when things dont go to plan. I believe I will always be this way and I also believe I will become better at it through out time. However, I vowe to still have spontaneoity in my sons life and fortunately,  his father compliments my planning vigour with his fun loving "spur of the moment" life mantra. I am glad my son will get to experience both sides.
I may seem to spew naivety with my projections for the future, but isn't that what I am supposed to be doing as a new mom? I'm working toward positive thinking and letting my overzealous planning work for me and not against me.
I am aware that my plans will come crashing down on me many many times, but I have my partner, my best friend, my sons father (all wrapped into one) to help me through those times. Thats what family is for right?